All Hallows' Eve Review

When you think of Halloween, what's the first thing that comes to mind? For me, it's trick-or-treating in costume while the wind rustles the leaves on the trees as you walk down the street, your costume shoes stomping on the leaves that have already fallen and you hear that satisfying crunch...-sigh-

Naturally, I love all films that revolve around October 31st. Trick 'r Treat is classic, and is in my top 5 favorite horror films of all time. Halloween doesn't get much more iconic. So when I heard about All Hallows' Eve (2013), I said "oh, I'm probably going to love this one!"

                                            photo from screamhorrormag.com


All Hallows' Eve tells the story of a babysitter and the two bratty kids she's watching after their Halloween festivities. They've been trick-or-treating and the night is rapidly coming to a close. The children are sitting around watching movies when Sarah (the babysitter) ushers them to bed. But the bratty brother finds a VHS tape in his trick-or-treat bag (uh...what?) and insists on playing it. After thoroughly disturbing themselves by watching a psychotic clown named Art become the ringleader to the "terror" on the tape, Sarah is left in the house alone while the children sleep. Is someone there with her?

Okay, you guys. I'm not going to lie, I went into this film with insanely high expectations because you all know how much I love, love, LOVE killer clowns. Pennywise is my man, Twisty is my BFF...any evil clown I can find, I will watch and devour with my eyeballs. I'm not scared of clowns, I just adore them. Don't ask me why.

Anyway, I'd heard about this one before, and I saw Art and thought "alright, this is right up my alley, let's go for it!" and then never got around to watching it. Cut to last night, and I was jumping for joy when I found out my friend had it on DVD. Popped it in, and I let the excitement commence...

Except it never came. This actually may be one of the worst films I've ever watched. There's no plot, and what the film lacks in plot, it only slightly makes up for it in gore. Sort of.

You get to see a baby cut out of a woman, and there are "creepy" aliens with noodle arms, but the whole process of getting to the points that are supposed to scare you are unnecessary, kind of annoying, drawn out, and really boring. The VHS itself is cool, it's almost like an anthology but it doesn't make any sense and it never comes together at the end, but nonetheless, it's the easiest part of the film to watch, besides Art.

Art is AWESOME. He's weird, disturbing, and he's very present. He's never lurking in the shadows, he's right in your face (except for the "second film" where he's kind of just a painting).

If you're looking for a good, classic Halloween film, skip over this one and move on to something more sophisticated like Trick 'r Treat. It's essentially the same, but done better.

This one gets a 3.5/10. Womp womp.

Do you guys have any great film suggestions for me? Let me know! Email me at taylorterriblehorror@gmail.com!

Alright guys, tomorrow is my birthday so I'm taking a trip to Sleepy Hollow. I'll let you know how it goes!!

Until next time, stay spooky <3
Taylor Terrible